Big Deal Energy

How to get over your fear of reaching out to executives

Laura Khalil

What if the only thing standing between you and securing those high-profile contracts is your own fear of reaching out? Join us in this episode of Big Deal Energy as we uncover how one of our Elevate Mastermind clients confronted and conquered her fear of connecting with high-level decision-makers. By identifying her self-limiting beliefs and turning them around, she transformed her outreach strategy and made impactful connections. We use a powerful analogy involving helping someone in pain to illustrate that titles are nothing to be intimidated by—we should, instead, focus on the value and solutions we bring to the table.

Our discussion doesn’t stop at overcoming fear; we also delve into the mindset shift needed for sincere and service-oriented business development. Learn how engaging with genuine curiosity and offering help can foster authentic relationships that lead to substantial opportunities. We'll share strategies to break down self-imposed barriers and initiate meaningful interactions. Plus, if you're keen to further hone your skills and land larger deals, don’t miss our recommendations to explore Elevate Launchpad for more comprehensive training and resources.

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Laura Khalil:

Hey y'all, it's your homegirl, laura Khalil. Welcome to this episode of Big Deal Energy. And today I got to get real with you and I have to ask you this question why aren't you reaching out to the people in an organization that you know could help you to get that contract signed? I'm bringing this up because it was a recent challenge that we faced inside of my Elevate Mastermind. I have an amazing client who has kicked ass and taken names over the last two years and she said to me recently Laura, you know I'm doing the outreach, I'm talking to people, but I've realized that it's not getting me anywhere because I'm not actually talking to any of the people who would be in a decision making position to bring me on for a contract. And I thought that's really interesting. And what she revealed is that she had come to realize that the reason she hadn't been reaching out to these people is because she was actually scared, and scared that like well, who is she to reach out to these folks? And they seem like quote unquote better than her or whatever story you know and I'm sure that I'm bringing this up with you today on the podcast because I would imagine that you have some type of story like that going on in your head and if you are hitting a wall and you're like well, laura says to do outreach, so I'm doing outreach but I'm not getting business or it's not working, I want you to consider what might I be doing? What am I responsible for here? Right, that is not working and needs to change.

Laura Khalil:

We know that business development works. We also know that it's important to know how to do business development in a way that it is actually effective. So if the business development isn't working for you, you want to start looking and sort of picking apart what might actually be broken, and there's a number of things that can be going wrong. But the one I want to focus on today is what's going on in your head and the things that we're avoiding doing because they seem scary. And just trying to think about, like revealing that to yourself, of us being self-actualized individuals on this planet is taking responsibility, and I believe firmly that we all co-create our reality. There are things that are happening around us that are firmly out of our control, but there are also an equal amount of things that we can control and that we can affect change on. So if things aren't going the way you want, ask yourself what am I in control of here? What can I change about this?

Laura Khalil:

And my client very wisely discerned that what she could change was who she was doing outreach to, and she revealed something interesting is that she didn't realize earlier that that was the problem. It was only by seeing the pattern that she could identify. Oh, she had a pattern going on. So one I just like want to congratulate her because that's really fucking smart and I'm not surprised because she's brilliant. But I also want to share with you if you are noticing a similar pattern in yourself of I am avoiding reaching out to these people because I'm intimidated, I'm scared, I don't think I have anything to offer them. I want to share with you the advice that I gave her that is making the difference and actually in one hour got her reaching out to the people that previously she was scared to reach out to.

Laura Khalil:

So I'd like to demonstrate this by way of analogy. I want you to imagine that you're walking down the street and you see someone who you know steps off, you know a curb or whatever it may be, and they fall flat on their face and they it looks like they probably twisted an ankle, they're in pain, they're lying there, they're crying, and you just walk on by. You totally ignore them because you get. You see them out of the corner of your eyes like, oh no, no, no, that's the VP at this company. I can't talk to them. I got to keep. I got to keep going straight, right, can you imagine that you would be fucking psycho OK, you would be absolutely psycho if you walked by somebody and they were literally in pain on the side of the street and you said, well, I can't talk to them because of their role or position in this company. You would never do that. You would go and offer help, and so sometimes we get really psyched out by the title of another human being.

Laura Khalil:

But I want you to remember that we sell solutions to problems as consultants, and that VP, that C-level executive that you're scared to reach out to, has, like, had a proverbial fall, and that fall is something like they have a board breathing down their neck. They have a lot of priorities they're required to execute over the course of the next quarter and they need to look good at the next quarterly meeting and they're not sure how it's all going to get done. They've already pushed their employees as much as they can push them, and they know that pushing them harder is not going to necessarily produce more or better results. They also know that when you are at the top, it is incredibly lonely and there's not a whole lot of support. So if you just had the ability to take some things off your plate and get some help, you might actually be desperate for it if you could find someone who solved those types of problems that you need solved.

Laura Khalil:

But we're just walking by, we're ignoring them because we're scared, and so this is what I want you to think about when you see someone you want to talk to, you have no idea what they could be facing and what they could be dealing with, unless you reach out to them. Right, we make assumptions about who people are and what people want all the time, and we try to read people's minds all the time and assume well, why would they want to talk to me? They're just going to tell me I'm wasting their time. But I want you to consider this Did you, did you ever have a dream in your life to become a psychic? Did you ever have a dream in your life, if you remember the Psychic Friends Network, did you ever have a dream to say you know, I don't want to be a consultant, I don't want to be a business owner, I want to go answer a 1-900 number. As a psychic, I want to. You know, miss Cleo, this shit, I'm going to guess none of you have your hands raised, but sure as hell a lot of you are trying to be freaking mind readers in your business.

Laura Khalil:

So why are we mind reading and assuming we know what someone needs, which is really just reflections? It's always a reflection of our self-limiting beliefs. Rather than walking in with some curiosity and saying, if I could be of service to potentially help this person that could actually really make their day, if I could give them a hand and help pull them off the sidewalk that they just tripped and stumbled over, wouldn't that be nice? Wouldn't they appreciate that? I certainly think they would. You know what to do.

Laura Khalil:

Go out, find that person you're afraid to talk, to reach out to that person that seems like they're quote-unquote better than you and start a conversation If you really want to learn how to do business development without being a sleazeball and you really want to grow a business where you are signing bigger deals with people you love to work with and reclaiming back your time to do the other things that really matter in your life. I would encourage you to check out Elevate Launchpad. That is our training program that can actually help you learn all of the techniques and tools, templates and scripts and strategies that my most successful clients use every single day to sign bigger deals. You can learn more about that at bravebydesignnet. Forward slash launchpad.